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Zer Netmouse
February 17th, 2008
10:41 am

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breakfast beginnings
Sometimes there are things you convince yourself you just don't have a knack for. For years, for me, that has been cooking bacon. Bill was good at cooking bacon, so I let him do it. I believed I was bad at it. He moved out last March, and this summer I dedicated myself to getting over that negative self-belief, to learn how to cook bacon.

It worked.

This morning, one week after the last of Bill's stuff has finally left the house, I sat down to a meal of perfectly cooked bacon*, fried eggs, toast, apple cider, and white grapefruit that I peeled, slice by slice, just for me. I sat in my house, looking out at my yard, eating a meal cooked by me and for me, all by myself.

And it felt really good.

It was also interesting to me that I was sitting at the green-topped folding table that I believe we used as our kitchen table back in that first Chicago burbs apartment, bringing a sense of continuity between those two beginnings. I'm optimistic that this beginning will lead to good things, just like that other one did, even though we eventually decided to end our partnership.

I will focus on the good, think hopeful thoughts, and remind myself to question the times when the little voice inside tells me that I'm just not good at something. I think I'll go grab another piece of bacon.


* Perfectly cooked bacon, in my book, has no burnt parts but is crispy enough that you can break it up with your fork.

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Comments
 
From:kitschicat
Date:February 17th, 2008 04:07 pm (UTC)
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You should submit this to This American Life. :)

From:tlatoani
Date:February 17th, 2008 04:11 pm (UTC)
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You're making me hungry. Wonder if we have any...
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From:naturalfractual
Date:February 17th, 2008 04:19 pm (UTC)

Precious moments

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All we really have are the pleasant moments we make for ourselves, our memories and our hope for the future.

Making a lovely moment like your breakfast is a treasure.

I have a similar moment, my mother and I preparing a perfect ham and egg breakfast and eating outside on her deck in Florida as two happy adults. To this day we remark on that morning and how much we enjoyed it.

Being alone is not as bad as some think it to be. It gives you a chance to pause and make your own decisions.

May you have countless more pieces of bacon!
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From:knightlygoddess
Date:February 17th, 2008 06:01 pm (UTC)
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New beginnings are always a chance for a new adventure, and should always be looked on as positively as you took your breakfast this morning. =)
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From:tammylc
Date:February 17th, 2008 09:17 pm (UTC)
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*smile*
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From:_earthshine_
Date:February 17th, 2008 09:30 pm (UTC)
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This is awesome, 'Mouse. These quiet moments to ourselves are bellweathers of our health, but it sounds like this one meant even more. Thanks for sharing.
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From:jennkitty
Date:February 17th, 2008 09:57 pm (UTC)
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This gives me hope for my own revelations and marked points of new beginning. And it's lovely. Thank you for sharing it.
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From:grimfaire
Date:February 18th, 2008 02:13 pm (UTC)
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I know I'm missing the real point...but cooking bacon is tough to get it right. As part of my never ending quest I spent time as a line cook at various establishments. It took quite a while to learn to cook bacon correctly so that it would turn out perfect every time. Good job. :)
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From:netmouse
Date:February 18th, 2008 04:16 pm (UTC)
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Thanks. :)
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From:grimfaire
Date:February 18th, 2008 04:28 pm (UTC)
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Of course... you know the absolute easiest method to cook perfect bacon?

Drop it in a deep fryer till it floats. No kidding... of course it's just that much more heart attack inducing...but what the hey... non-burnt, crispy bacon every time. :)
From:childe
Date:February 18th, 2008 03:50 pm (UTC)
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mmmm.... bacon...
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