You were hoping for (and got) a cat with an M on her forehead? I can't help but envision Speed Racer... does she have a little helmet too?
Aww... Bill is such a sweetie... sleeping on the floor so the cat wouldn't be lonely? I can't imagine an actual human being behaving in such a nice manner. Have you checked him for sainthood recently?
Six Warning Signs that you may be Married to a Saint:
1. Birds suddenly appear, every time he is near.
2. Can be used as a cure for diseases such as leprosy and cataracts.
3. Tendency to give away all of his worldly possesions.
4. When the light strikes him in a certain way, quite beatific. May exhibit halo.
5. You find yourself wanting to crucify him.
6. Two words: Snake Banishing.
If you notice more than one of these symptoms, see a doctor or psychologist immediately. Sainthood is no longer the incurable disease it once was, with advances like penicillin, and no social stigmata should attach to... oh damn.
Seven Warning Signs....